So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
