If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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