Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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