Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Randomize
