I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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