He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize