It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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