No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize