Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
