I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
