her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
