the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
