I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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