Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Randomize