You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
