Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
3pm strippers are depressing
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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