Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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