You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Randomize
