That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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