Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
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