mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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