Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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