I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
