this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
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