I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you traded sex for a burrito?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
