As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
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