with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
