no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
