Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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