Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
