im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
