Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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