So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
