hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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