Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
