just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
