I hate your face
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize