There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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