She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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