So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
