Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
