then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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