went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize