from now on my penis is your penis
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
