I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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