just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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