After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
my shit smells like andre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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