I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
