I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
