no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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